Bowling is my favorite sport, but tennis is a close fourth -- behind golf and curling. Therefore, I offer this expert (and totally unsoliticed) commentary on the U.S. Open. Specifically, catty comments on the fashion -- which is much more fun to watch than the actual tennis.
Serena's wardrobe malfunction: Her black dress with the provocatively placed pink band was FAB-YOU-LUS -- if you're going for that I'm an undercover cop on a stakeout kinda look.
And when she started fiddling with the bow late in the match, lordy, even Janet Jackson was holding her breath in fear of a double fault.
Pete suggests form-fitting shorts and a crop top to better accentuate Serena's buns of steel. My focus would be above the neck, where her ghetto-fabulous hubcap-sized earrings could cost her the tournament.
Fashion Grand Slams: Venus, unlike her younger sis, was a vision in torquoise. And Roger was regal in royal blue.
The Ova under: Who can keep all the Russians Amazons straight? I can, because Svetlana Kuznetsova stands out -- and not in a good way. Then again, she did defeat another Ova - Klara Zakopalova of the Czech Republic -- in the first round.
Crown Vic: Ana Ivanovic of Serbia was a vision in lavender. She may not make it past the quarters -- but we'll be clicking on her web site for months to come.